Tuesday, 6 November 2012 07:19

Believe you can and you're halfway there.
Hi there. Today I took three papers which were History, Mathematics and Kemahiran Hidup. I've worked my ass off but sometimes things that we want don't just immediately appear. When I was doing Math, I started from the last question to the first. The last questions from 30 to 40 got me like asdfghjkl. I could barely answer all of them so I left 10 questions. I got no watch and yes that is something that should not happen to a student who is about to take an important test but no can do and I had no idea that the time was almost over so I got chillax and my head was spinning so I rested. Then the teacher said 'put your pen down' and I couldn't even take a single breathe because of my legit panic. I freaked out and panicked and I eventually asked my friend the answers and yes I was cheating but that happened urgently. The teacher just literally stared at me and sort of scolded me. You know how I feel when someone raises her voice towards me when I'm weak. Yeah I could just cry but I said to myself 'stay strong' on this stupid paper. Then the teacher told me to just answer what I thought the best and I couldn't do that. Seriously, I could have just failed the test if I answered the wrong answers. And besides, this is the final examination. I swore to myself I can't do that. If I can't answer the question, I will even guess what's the best and what I can remember. For short, I will just think logically aaannnnddd she wanted me to just guess the wrong answer? Heck no. I swear to myself that I don't want to be in that condition anymore. I seriously burst my tears and let them all stream down tickling my cheeks. The only person I wanted to hug and tell everything that time was my mom. I couldn't count on my friends and mother knows best. All I hope for now is, hoping the best from Allah and I will try to accept whatever result I will get. I mean no. I mean, ugh. I don't know but hey, believe you can and you're halfway there. Yes, if I believe that I can, then that means I will work even harder and I'm halfway to my dream. I'm not good at this. You know what I mean. Well uhm I just hope for the best among the best for myself. I hope so. Please do pray for me if you're having a leisure time. Pahala pahala. Lol whatever. I'm worried to death right now about my result. *Deep sigh* Insya-Allah my upcoming result can at least satisfy me a little bit. I guess I will stop for now. Bye.

Sealed with lots of xs,
Your dearest,

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